How to Become a Better Homemaker

Are you longing to make your home a place of warmth, comfort, and order—a true sanctuary for your loved ones?

Homemaking is about more than keeping a tidy space; it’s about creating an environment where love and connection flourish. Whether you’re seeking better routines, hoping to simplify daily tasks, or looking to bring a personal touch to each room, becoming a better homemaker is within reach. In this blog post, you’ll find practical steps and encouragement to transform your home into a space that nurtures everyone who walks through the door.

When I first became a homemaker way back in 1991, I had no idea what I was doing. To be honest, I liked the idea of being a homemaker a whole lot more than I enjoyed the actual work of being a homemaker and I felt a lot of shame and failure. I was struggling so bad!

I had my first baby when I was very young – 15 years old – and I got married three months after giving birth. I left my parents home in Pensacola, Florida and moved to a little town in Georgia (near where I had grown up) called Manchester, Georgia. My husband, David, and I lived with his grandparents for 3 months before moving into our own little duplex apartment in Athens Georgia so that David could continue his studies at the University of Georgia.

Melissa and James

I didn’t appreciate it nearly enough when I was 15 and (apparently) ungrateful, but my husband’s Granny (I called her Mrs. Jackson) was an excellent homemaker. Her home was immaculate all the time and everything had a place and nothing was ever messy. She took a lot of pride in her home and homemaking endeavors like cooking and cleaning.

Mrs. Jackson taught me to be a homemaker. Every day, during the 3 months that I lived with her, she would take me alongside her as she did household chores, laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc., and shared her processes with me. She was very detailed in showing me exactly how she did everything and the correct way to care for a family and home.

Mrs. Jackson invested so much time into me and she wanted to see me blossom and grow as a homemaker so that I could care for my family well. She passed away a few years ago and oh how I cried. She was a hard working, thoughtful woman who cared for and loved her family well.

Despite her sharing her wisdom and knowledge with me – and that sharing didn’t just stop when I moved out – those first few years of being a full time homemaker were hard. I didn’t have the self-discipline I needed to really be a good homemaker. But my heart longed for more and I wanted to do better.

A Guide to Cultivating a Warm, Organized, and Nurturing Home

When you find yourself asking, “How can I be a better homemaker?” it’s often because you desire to create a home that is peaceful, organized, and welcoming. Maybe you’ve been feeling overwhelmed by all the tasks that come with homemaking, or perhaps you just want to find a deeper sense of fulfillment in your role. Maybe you were like me and started out young and immature and needing to grow.

Melissa and James
Me (age 17) with James (age 2)

Whatever your motivation, you can begin your journey toward a better homemaking experience with intentional steps that will make your home a place of comfort and joy. Here are some areas to focus on as you grow into the homemaker you want to be.

How to Become a Better Homemaker

1. Build Routines That Serve Your Family

Routines create structure, making it easier to manage your responsibilities without feeling frazzled. You can start with small routines, like a morning ritual to kickstart the day on a positive note or an evening cleanup to prepare for the next day.

These routines bring predictability to your household, helping everyone know what to expect. You might find that a consistent evening reset, where toys are put away, and the kitchen is tidied, provides a calm and welcoming space for the morning. Over time, these small routines will make a big difference.

2. Focus on Organization Over Perfection

A well-organized home feels more peaceful, but organization doesn’t mean your home has to look like it’s straight out of a magazine. It’s about creating systems that make life easier.

Start by focusing on areas that are frequently used, like the entryway, kitchen, or family room. Designate spots for commonly used items to make things easier for both you and your family. Creating a coffee station, a homework area, or a drop-zone for shoes and bags can help keep your space functional without aiming for perfection.

Remember, an organized home is one that works for you.

3. Simplify Your Cleaning Strategy

Keeping your home clean doesn’t have to be overwhelming or time-consuming. A cleaning schedule can help you tackle tasks without feeling like you have to do everything at once. You can follow my Rhythm and Rest Cleaning System or break down your cleaning into zones to give you focus and keep each area of your home fresh.

Devote a few minutes each day to quick cleanups or focus on one major task per day. Simplifying your approach will help you stay consistent without burning out.

4. Embrace Meal Planning

Meal planning is a game-changer for busy homemakers. By planning your meals ahead of time, you’ll save money, reduce last-minute stress, and keep meals enjoyable for your family. Start small, planning just a week’s worth of dinners, and think about meals that are simple but nutritious.

Incorporate seasonal ingredients to add variety, and don’t be afraid to bulk cook or double recipes to fill your freezer with ready-to-go meals. Meal planning not only nourishes your family but also brings you peace of mind.

related: Easy Meal Planning eBook

5. Create Intentional Spaces

The way your home is set up can influence the atmosphere and help foster connection. Think about how each room is used and what mood you want to create.

In the family room, add cozy blankets and comfortable seating to encourage togetherness. In the kitchen, keep countertops clear to make cooking easier.

Small touches, like a family photo wall or a meaningful piece of artwork, can make each space feel personal. Your home doesn’t need to be flawless; it just needs to feel like a reflection of your family’s love and values. This is one of my favorite parts of homemaking – creating spaces that feel like HOME.

6. Prioritize Connection Over Perfection

Homemaking isn’t about achieving a picture-perfect home; it’s about creating a space where your family feels loved and connected. Set aside time for family dinners, game nights, or simple traditions that bring you closer.

Small rituals, like Sunday pancakes or a weekly movie night, make lasting memories and give your loved ones something to look forward to. Remember, the moments spent together are what make your house feel like a home.

In our house, we love game nights and often get together to play with extended family and friends. So many good memories!

7. Embrace Flexibility and Grace

It’s easy to feel discouraged on difficult days, but remember that homemaking is a journey, not a destination. Give yourself grace when things don’t go as planned, and remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can.

Whether it’s a busy week or an unexpected event throws off your schedule, embrace flexibility. There’s no perfect way to be a homemaker, and accepting this will bring you a sense of peace and resilience. You can learn new skills, improve your systems, and simplify your life – but while you do all of those things, give yourself grace.

8. Make Room for Personal Growth

To be a better homemaker, you also need to take care of yourself. Don’t forget to read your Bible and pray daily. Carve out time for personal interests, whether that’s a hobby, reading books, or a moment of quiet for nap. This self-care is essential, as it helps you recharge and bring joy and positivity into your homemaking.

Try picking up new skills, whether it’s a cooking technique, a creative craft, or a DIY home project that adds a unique touch to your space. Nurturing your own growth makes you feel more confident and fulfilled in your role. I love how many ways there are to grow as a homemaker and be a blessing to your family. It’s never boring!

9. Cultivate Self-Discipline for Lasting Change

Self-discipline is key to staying consistent, even when motivation is low. Setting up a few daily goals or routines will help keep you on track and make homemaking easier over time. If you tend to procrastinate, start by setting small, realistic goals, like tidying up a specific area each day or planning meals for the week.

Use checklists or a planner to break tasks down into manageable pieces. Self-discipline isn’t about being hard on yourself—it’s about building habits that bring peace and order to your home.

You can take my course, The Disciplined Homemaker inside the Homemaker’s Society!

10. Build a Community of Like-Minded Homemakers

Lastly, homemaking doesn’t have to be done alone. Surround yourself with others who share your goals and values by joining online forums, social media groups, or local meet-ups. Having a community to share ideas, struggles, and tips will make your journey easier and more enjoyable.

You’ll gain encouragement, feel supported, and find new inspiration as you exchange stories with others who understand the joys and challenges of homemaking. And if you’re longing to make new friends, join me inside the Homemaker’s Society where you can download the app and chat with me and other homemakers like just like you on a daily basis!


Becoming a better homemaker is about making small, purposeful changes that help you create a home filled with warmth and connection. it doesn’t happen overnight, but can happen with a little self discipline and practice!

Focus on routines that serve you, create spaces that reflect your family, and embrace the journey with flexibility and grace.

Remember, homemaking is as much about the people inside your home as it is about your house itself. Each day brings new opportunities to grow, connect, and create a home that feels like a true sanctuary for you and your loved ones.

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2 Comments

  1. Gabrielle says:

    Lovely post ! 💗

    When it was the hardest for me I purposed that I would overcome the difficulties and would become a better homemaker.
    I stuck with a routine and taught my children a little each day and eventually we were doing it as if it had never been difficult at all.
    It is possible and extremely rewarding. 😊

    1. Melissa Ringstaff says:

      Yes! Even if you think you’re a terrible homemaker and have no idea what you’re doing, it’s possible to learn and grow and improve your skills. Thanks so much for sharing Gabrielle!